Walking into a red wall

I can hear the clock ticking by,
How it reminds me the lesser time i have.
Want to go out but can’t move,
Suddenly it’s hard to leave this temporary roof.

Is it the noise of the once loved music,
Or is it just the inner voice?
It’s painful, it’s making me sick
Someone make it stop or i will die.

Death. Such a beautiful word it has become lately,
But i lack the courage to make it a part of life.
Heaven or hell? Just an afterthought. All i see,
Is the darkness looming all around.

I can hear the cries, not so far away
How they remind me of those agonizing days.
Want to stop breathing once and for all,
Be done with complaining and praying to the white ceiling wall.

-Eva Mittal