I am Grey

I amuse myself
Maybe that’s why I try to find myself among the things that I see, the people that I meet or the Books that I read
I am like everyone, yet I am like none
How surprising that can be?
I ask them what they think of me but at the end of the day, nothing really matters to me
I talk to all, converse with few
I wish to be present and still long to vanish like a dew
As if it never happened, I forget effortlessly only to let it haunt me till eternity
I am terrified of life but I love being alive
I’d tell them they don’t matter to me and still yearn for their voice
I am too Beautiful to not be Loved, but maybe, that’s not enough
Be it Night or be it day,
Hope scares me for they never stay
I held the moments so strong, I embraced the gloom so close
Wish I knew how to let it all go
I am excruciatingly overwhelming
But I wouldn’t want to be any other way
If only being myself was a choice
I keep on running but I can never really go far
I keep on coming back for more
I wish to write poetry but want to stop thinking anymore
It strangles me, leaves me cold
But this plague of passion indulges me
Brilliance of discovery, a soul so old
With me, things are never what they seem to be
My curiosity lingers around
I only feel too much when they are nowhere to be found
I wish to be touched but if it’s gentle, it’ll hurt me anyway
I wish to be here and also to drift somewhere far away
I keep on thinking about the things I wish to hide
I love to torture, I love the fight
But giving pain to someone ruins my mind
I hate the agony but I still don’t want it to end
I am never the lover, I am always someone more than just a friend
The humor in my existence
I think Loving someone is great
But despise myself for doing that
I can only give unconditionally
But my Love doesn’t comes easily
I love the red of the roses
But the red of the gore always appeals to me more
I’m insatiable who keeps on getting scared of nothing at all
I am the whispers of the wind, I am the magnanimity of fire
I am the truthful, I am the liar
I am an epitome of contradiction
I am the traveler with no direction
I continue living in this unnatural fit,
I am the biggest hypoycrite